Explosion…. Fireworks… Heaven and Earth colliding in that one moment where you believe all of the universe has created a symphony just for you and your new fling. It is magic, it is hypnotic, it is addictive, it is temporary.
As I have said in previous posts (like my Valentine’s Day post) relationships are so much more than temporary feelings. Almost everyone I know loves the emotional high and rush of a new relationship. You have tons of energy, are constantly fantasizing about the other person…. you wonder what will happen next, how far will you go on the next date…….. do they feel the same way? Many of these feelings are not logical…. they are biological, they are deep within us. We are programmed to feel this way about potential mates. Yet what happens when the excitement wears off? What do you do when the fireworks disappear?
I believe this is the true test of a relationship. When the house is dirty, the dishes are not clean and life gets mundane….. in those moments, how do you feel about your partner or spouse? THOSE are the moments that count. When you are working together at two in the morning to clean the vomit your five-year old has projected all over the room – THOSE are the moments that count. Can you smile at each other, hug each other, and support each other in the midst of the celebrations and the heartache? True love is not those amazing feelings at the beginning of the relationship – those feelings are natural and wonderful ,and so very fun, but they are not love….. they are LUST. The feelings that settle in after a few years. The feelings of stability and support… these are the realities of enduring love – and this is ultimately what we all want to strive for. Enduring, lasting, love means far more to me than any fireworks display.
Today, 282 days ’til 40, I am reminded how lucky I am to be able to live with my partner a life of enduring love. I wish the same for you.