Today I went to a wedding that had an unusual guest…. a chicken. I was fairly certain that it was not actually on the guest list, but the little bird made her presence quite known. Among other things, she pecked the feet of the waiters and waitresses and even pecked my partner’s foot while I took the above photo!
As it happens, we have been to a lot of weddings lately. I often find weddings to be so interesting. I love the concept of declaring your love for another person in front of supportive friends and family, yet it seems like the ceremonies have gotten out of hand. I know many individuals who have argued with their parents as they did NOT want their parents to invite their parent’s friends and colleagues to their wedding – they only wanted guests connected to them that they knew. This makes sense to me.
I have told many brides that their wedding planning stress levels are reduced when they are able to understand that the wedding is really not for the bride, but for everyone else. These run away days have moved past a love declaration to family needs for parties, and often a woman’s need to play out her childhood fantasy of being a princess for a day.
My partner and I were married in a small ceremony with close family joining us. It was such a pleasure to declare our love in a non-threatening way that was about us, and not about those who attended.
Today, 190 days ’til 40, I am happy for weddings that are truly about the couple being married. If you get married, I hope your wedding will be this way.
~400daystil40
Fortuitous Forty!!! 
boomiebol
August 15, 2012 at 00:13
I agree my wedding had about 50 guests or less… No noise no fuss. Often mothers of the bride get so carried away with excitement and make it bigger than usual. I know my mom would have wanted a super sized wedding for me if she was around.
400daystil40
August 16, 2012 at 15:39
How nice, I did similar! 🙂
Long Life Cats and Dogs
August 15, 2012 at 00:36
it really isn’t difficult to ensure a lack of fighting. Just do it my way, give yourself 2 months from engagement to wedding day! That way, no-one has time to get stressed about anything. It went of brilliantly and I cannot remember being stressed at any point.
400daystil40
August 16, 2012 at 15:39
What a great idea!
walkwiththerabbi
August 15, 2012 at 01:41
Warm greetings!!! When Fran and I got married almost 30 years ago, we had everything in our home – service, celebration, everything! The guests were our children and closest friends – and it was meaningful and memorable. I’m with you! By the way, thank you so very much for “liking” my post last Sunday (The Day the Earth Cried). Coming from you, it means something special! Blessings to you and yours. Hugs from here.
400daystil40
August 16, 2012 at 15:39
Wow, sounds like a wonderful wedding!!! 🙂
Teresa
August 15, 2012 at 02:49
Just wanted to say thank you for stopping by and checking out my blog. I hope you enjoy the recipes. Feel free to browse through the archives any time!
400daystil40
August 16, 2012 at 15:38
You are welcome and thank you for stopping by as well!
buckwheatsrisk
August 15, 2012 at 03:26
i agree, how is it that the most special day for a bride and groom becomes about pleasing everyone else?! i think if i had it to do over, (which thankfully i don`t) i would elope…we actually talked about it but didn`t want to upset anyone…ha!
400daystil40
August 16, 2012 at 15:38
yea, I completely understand that!!!
buckwheatsrisk
August 16, 2012 at 17:34
it’s so weird!
Lela Bonchjela
August 15, 2012 at 04:15
I have clearly warned my parents that I don’t want to invite extended family, especially those I don’t even know exist, like my granny’s cousin’s daughters and whatever. I don’t think wasting money to feed them is necessary. I’d rather use that for my honeymoon!
400daystil40
August 16, 2012 at 15:36
🙂
Victoria Elizabeth
August 15, 2012 at 18:14
I nearly made myself insane with planning. Seriously. I was unrecognizable as myself… However? It was all worth it. To me at least. My husband could have done with less intensive craziness over details.
400daystil40
August 16, 2012 at 15:34
It is great that it was worth it for you – I hear mixed feelings after the fact, some were happy and others think the stress was not necessary – I guess it depends on how much suffering there was vs. the amazing day.
viveka
August 15, 2012 at 21:30
I love weddings too – but in my age .. are they getting less and more funerals. The concept, I don’t know about that … to promise to love somebody for better and for worst .. for rich or poor .. in health and sickness – and 3 years later divorce comes along. For me it’s just a show for the galleries, but I still love them.
400daystil40
August 16, 2012 at 15:33
I agree… it is a show, but can be fun (most of the time)
viveka
August 16, 2012 at 16:00
Yes, I enjoy going to weddings – even if I have mix feelings about the “show”.
knitxpressions
August 17, 2012 at 08:01
that reminds me….there was a peacock that came by to nose around on my best friend’s wedding day. I must say though, it surely beats having a chicken pecking at the guests 🙂
400daystil40
August 17, 2012 at 23:30
That is so funny!
pinksheep3108
August 18, 2012 at 01:07
I think you’re absolutely right about the wedding thing! I’ve been talking and thinking about this quite a lot recently and the one thing that really seems to stick out is that people spend SO MUCH!!! I don’t think I could justify spending so much money on one day…plus the thought of being the main focus for a day scares me – I do a lot of very silly things every day!!! 🙂
Nice post – strange thing with a chicken at a wedding though!
400daystil40
August 19, 2012 at 00:48
Thank you! I agree that the expense for one day is ridiculous. I know people who go in debt – crazy! And others that could have bought a car or had a downpayment for a new home. Not so wise…
mybeautfulthings
August 18, 2012 at 17:23
Thank you for visiting my blog and liking ‘Raindrops, Truro and Shopping (and Robert Frost)
I like what you say about weddings here. I conduct Humanist weddings and they are always the intimate and very special occasions you mention. I’ve done Ceremonies on the beach, in the woods, in the back garden, on the cliffs and every one has been unique and delightful. 🙂
400daystil40
August 19, 2012 at 00:46
Thank you for visiting as well! 🙂